I have this theory that communities provide three fundamental things that human beings seek: Comfort, Joy, and Empowerment.

1. Comfort. It’s that feeling of being with like-minded people, kindred spirits, people who “get me.” I know that I belong. When I did group coaching for boundary crossers last year, I heard this phrase repeatedly: “I thought I was the only one who felt like that.” Communities can provide the glove that fits perfectly and in the process, give each of us comfort that we are not alone.

2. Joy. There’s strength in numbers and in communities, this can translate into joy. I think of my experiences as part of a marching band in high school, as a sorority member in college, and as a member of an online coaching community. Being part of something bigger than myself makes me proud and inspired. I feel joyful. Within the ABV team of consultants and advisors, we have a mini-community. It’s joyful because I can learn and laugh, with people I like and respect.

3. Empowerment. Yes, this word is overused to the point of cliche. So let me say what empowerment looks like to me. Empowerment is finding the capacity to do something that previously seemed out of reach. It creates the confidence to act. In fact, this newfound capacity compels me to act. I don’t know if there’s a domino effect, where comfort and joy lead to empowerment in a community. But it sure seems like if you have the first two, the third is not far behind.

I recently received a comment on my other blog, Ordinary Life, Extraordinary Living, which pointed me to what can happen when we fully engage in a conversation. It starts with advice distilled from an in-person community of smart women, then moves to comments from readers providing their own advice, to a woman, Dora, in Hong Kong, who takes the advice to heart and decides to quit her job and buy a one-way ticket to London. Click here to read the thread of this conversation. It clearly shows how the comfort, joy, and empowerment of a community can produce a stunning result.

What big adventures are in store for this community? I can’t wait to see what unfolds…..