Over the last few months, I've been researching failure. It's my nature to learn about what I'm experiencing. So when I felt like I had failed this past summer in making a profitable business out of My Alumni Link, I started asking the question, "What role does failure play in being an entrepreneur?'
I talked to fellow entrepreneurs. I read articles about failure. And I gravitated to books on the topic. Photo by tinou bau
One book that I recently finished is Adapt: Why Success Always Starts With Failure by Tim Harford. Written by an economist, the book is uneven–going into gory detail about climate change and the financial crisis of 2008 and giving only minimal coverage to how individuals deal with failure. I found the most relevant part of the book to be the last chapter, which brought home the concepts from the preceding 200 pages and applied them to how human beings deal with failure.
Harford presents a simple model for looking at failure:
- Try new things. (Yes, I do this on a regular basis.)
- Try them in the context where failure is survivable. (Brilliant! Why didn't I think of that? I have barely survived some of my more spectacular failures.)
- Know when you've failed and learn from your failures. (I can always get better at this one.)
Sounds like common sense but the author shows that all of these steps can go awry if we're not purposeful. Of the three steps in the model, I'm most intrigued by the third. I had always thought this was straightforward, but Harford lists three obstacles to learning from your mistakes:
- Denial
- Self-destructive behavior (e.g., throwing good money after bad)
- Convincing ourselves that the mistake doesn't matter
And here is where it gets really interesting. Harford advocates identifying a "validation squad"–individuals who "will back you but also tell it like it is." These are people who are both compassionate and hard hitting when it comes to telling you the truth. (BTW–this sounds like a coach to me. Just saying.) People who "can help us hold two jostling thoughts at the same time: I am not a failure–but I have made a mistake." Photo by andyp uk
This last idea, separating who I am (not a failure) with the result of my actions (a mistake), is powerful. At least it was for me.
I am encouraged by the fact that I'm getting used to the idea of making mistakes, big ones, as a natural part of the journey. It allows me to commiserate with fellow entrepreneurs. More importantly, I see that every step of the way, independent of outcome, contributes to who I am today.