Okay, I’m imagining that I’m going to get alot of flack from Oprah fans. And this needs to be said.

I watched the premiere episode of Oprah’s Big Give. Like many other people, I was touched by the emotion that the show evoked. I cry at movies all the time. People getting large sums of money cry as well. The recipients of the Big Give, aided by a pair of Big Givers chosen by the show’s producers, were genuinely grateful. 

Here’s what I take issue with. The show takes a good concept, strangers helping change the lives of strangers, and subjugates us to minute after minute of "giving fish." Large checks, many provided by corporate sponsors, for people with stories that are meant to tug at the heartstrings.

This is in contrast to a Wall Street Journal interview with Muhammad Yunus, the founder of Grameen Bank and inventor of micro-lending. Grameen Bank makes small loans to the poor, mostly women, and has done this to the tune of billions of dollars since 1983. 98% of the debts are repaid. He describes the difference between "giving fish" and "teaching to fish" in this way:

In philanthropy, the "dollar has only one life, you can use it once….social business dollar has endless life, it recycles. And you build institutions….when it’s an institution you bring creativity into it. You bring innovation into it. You bring continuity into it."

Yunus has the same intention–to change lives and to increase options for people. And he uses a business model to do it. He says, "the moment you bring in a business model, immediately you become concerned about the cost, about the revenue, the sustainability, teh surplus generation, how to bring more efficiency, how to bring technology, …charity doesn’t have that same package." It’s left brain methodology meets right brain need.

Back to Oprah. The Big Give is mostly right brain feel-good. To be fair, some of the money raised by the Big Givers was earmarked for education of children. How about job training for the young widow who wanted to keep her house? Or training on investing and personal finance? How about educating the owner of a non-profit for disabled children on a business model that would provide sustainability after the lights and camera were gone?  What happened to helping people by teaching them skills and increasing their capacity to be independent, outside of a lump sum of money?

The show became over the top when a pair of Big Givers took their designated recipient, a young widow with twin pre-schoolers to the local Target for a toy shopping spree. Did we really have to see them leaving Target with not one or two but six to ten grocery carts stuffed with toys?  What does that tell my children about helping others? Inundate them, to the point of ridiculous, wasteful abundance, and that will make both the giver and receiver feel better? I don’t think so.

I felt like I had been hit over the head with a big tuna.

It was only towards the end of the show that one of the judges talked about a focus on giving gifts that keep on giving. The judges critique the Big Givers on their performance and determine which one gets kicked off the show each week.

I took issue with this part of the show.  I understand that the trend of reality shows is to build suspense through competition. Who will be kicked out next is a powerful pull to put the show on my weekly viewing schedule.

And there’s something indecent about giving criticism, sometimes harsh, in front of not only one’s peers, but millions of television viewers. Sure, I can be Tuesday morning quarterback and tell someone what they did wrong. But does that make me right?

What ever happened to treating people with dignity? One woman, who had been essentially reprimanded by one of the judges, looked like she was ready to grovel after she was allowed to stay for another week. Is this what we want to teach people? How to grovel?

I’m not the only one who was turned off by the Big Give. You can read more here.

I’ve admired alot of Oprah’s work and the way she’s built a caring community. This is not one of her finer moments. It’s intention gone astray, without a mindfulness that the means is as important as the ends.